I woke up at 6am. I had left the lights on, and the radio on, and the heat had been running all night.

I dreamed I was on a haunted ocean liner that belonged to Queen Victoria and Prince Albert. I spent the earlier part of the dream exploring the upper deck and walking down hallways and staircases like I often do in my dreams. I went below deck to explore Queen Victoria’s chambers and walked down a staircase into a room with a large picture window on the left side of the room and bookshelves full of books on the other walls.

Looking out the large window I could see the waves of the ocean swelling and crashing onto the side of the ship and against the window. I wanted to look at the books on the bookshelves but I kept my eyes on what I could see through the window. We had hit bad weather and the waves became increasingly violent. When a really big wave hit, I was thrown onto the glass and it felt like the ship was going to flop over by the power of the ocean.

When I woke up I felt like I was going to drown. I opened my eyes and breathed and focused on the song that was playing from my radio. I thought it was FKA Twigs singing at first, I recognized the song but couldn’t think of the name, and as the song continued and I woke up more I realized it was that Lana Del Rey song that goes, “there’s things I want to say to you, but I’ll just let you live,” and it felt appropriate, like a scene in a film.